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Recap catch-up: The Spectacular Dungeon-Crawl! | Shaolin Punk

Recap catch-up: The Spectacular Dungeon-Crawl!

Back in July, we used the release of Lego Batman 2: The Videogame and The Amazing Spider-Man as fairly flimsy excuses to make out July 4 show a superhero themed spectacular!

It is the near future, a time when the heroes we know have retired or paid the ultimate price in the battle against evil. It is time now for new, younger heroes to take up the mantle; and in the city of Mega-Frankston, those heroes are:

  • Lisa-Skye, writer, comedian and ladies man, fell into a vat of mysterious radioactive super-glitter factory, giving her the ability to shoot blinding, golden sparkles, and the powers of fabulousness and sass! Her only weakness? The colour beige! What else could she call herself? She is…Golden Shower!
  • Patrick O’Duffy, writer, was bitten by a radioactive Adam West at Comic Con, becoming Batman-Man – an avenger (of the night) who has ultimate knowledge of Batman, his very own animal sidekick (Batman-Man-Bat), and the means to fund his war on crime through his secret identity as an online game gold farmer. His weaknesses? Comics, of course – and the deadly paper cuts they can deliver!
  • Brenna Courtney Glazebrook, improviser, actor and comedian, was the silent but violent super-powered French(ish) mime artist, Super Du Jour! Her power of terrible mime enables her to create invisible boxes, summon strong winds, open doors and generally annoy the shit out of people. She does have another skill, normally forbidden to mimes – she is an opera singer! But she cannot stand Englishmen.

At the Legion of Heroes Club, hidden under the Mega-Frankston dole office, an aging Spider-Man – his costume shrunk in the wash by one of the new heroes – sends our paragons of justice on their first mission to investigate a heist at a jewellery store in Collins Street. Once they arrive, the store has clearly been broken into, but none of the gems have been touched – or so it seems, until they discover the demonic Mexican wrestler El Diablo taking one very specific gemstone! Despite our young heroes best efforts, he vanquishes them and gets away with the gem, leading our disgraced champions to go through a training montage to improve their skills.

Following a lead, the heroes visit Dr. Rocks, a gem expert at Mega-Frankston TAFE, interviewing him with extreme prejudice. He tells them that the gem could be used as a focussing lens for a powerful laser, and that there are rumours that a supervillain who had killed many of Earth’s old heroes was building a superweapon in his hideout – in the old comic book factory! This useful plot-propelling knowledge led our heroes to the gates of the factory, which Golden Shower destroyed with her sass. Guarding the doors of the factory, though, was magical supervillain Captain Fantastic – in reality, Adam West – but a combined attack from our heroes repelled him. Inside the factory, our heroes again faced El Diablo, this time using all their newly honed skills to emerge triumphant!

In the heart of the lair, though, they trip a feindish deathtrap: a mind control device on display in an indestructible glass box! It forces our heroes to fight each other, until they manage to knock the glass box over, exposing the device. In the final shocking revelation, the supervillain turned out to be “The Red Cloak”, a colourblind man named “John” who had grown bored of World of Warcraft and decided to seek quests in the real world. Spurred by the citizens of Mega-Frankston, Golden Shower learned the traditional meaning of her superhero name and used this newfound…”skill” to put John right off his plans. The day was saved!

While our usual photographer Rob Young was unavailable to document the super-powered escapades, friend of Dungeon Crawl and Lisa-Skye, Timothy Zeven, took up the challenge, and you can see the amazing results below!

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