On April 11, Andrew McClelland morphed into Gax Garyguy, a shape changer with the power to inspire sexual repression; Brenna Courtney Glazebrook was “Queester”, Queen of Easter, who brought easter eggs (good) and diabetes (bad); Dave Bloustien was hypnotist Dr. Zhivago (no relation); and Christophe Davidson brought the majesty of Sweatheart the Barbarian, who had maximum points in Patience, Conflict Resolution and Empathy (he was raised by fairies). They went on a quest to recover the sacred jewel of Mansiontown, a town in the shadow of an old mansion on a nearby hill. Despite encountering the zombie of a previous adventurer who failed the same quest, they pushed on into the house, where a two-headed ogre (guest monsters Dingo & Wolf) was defeated by convincing one of the heads that the other was being mean about it, before patching up their friendship and sending it on its way. They managed to retrieve the gemstone and return it to the monk who gave them the quest, who turned out to be evil – but also Queester’s brother, so it all worked out in the end.

On April 19, Adam McKenzie became Havugottit, an elvish swordsell (he sells swords), and was joined by three first time crawlers:  Matt Elsbury as Arfice Highbuckle, the six foot dwarf (it’s a pituitary thing), Mark Gambino as Takeshi Takeshi, a samurai priest allergic to egg timers who once kissed a dog, and Dave Callan as Thundercock the Warlock, whose magical blades “Truth” and “Justice” gave him 50% mana recharge and +69 to sex. Their quest: to save the city of Snowtown in Somesortaland by finding the ancient Temple of Livejournal and its font of power blessed by Glob, God of Blogs. There they must enchant a weapon to kill Buttons, the evil dragon god who plagues Snowtown. They defeated the evil cultist who had taken over the temple, suffering only the loss of Arfice’s wombat familiar and a curse which turned Takeshi into a were badger; they did, however, pick up everything that wasn’t nailed down, giving the loot to mobile shopfront Havugottit. They eventually chose to enchant a chair in the font of power, and brought it back to  Snowtown; they convinced Buttons to sit in the chair, at which point he was transformed into a dog and…well, things took an unexpected turn, but the town was saved!

How on Earth do we follow up a couple of sessions like that? Well, by heading off Earth! This Wednesday, May 2nd, is close enough to Star Wars Day that we’ve decided to make a tradition: every May show will be Star Wars flavoured! So come to Dungeon Crawl Episode V: The Empire Crawls Back, and join rebel leaders and Dungeon Jedi Masters Ben “Obi-Wan” McKenzie and Richard “that thing in the trash compactor” McKenzie, plus guest comedians and improvisers Jack Druce (Too Short For A Stormtrooper, Introvert Def Jam), Nadia Collins (The Big Hoo-Haa, Museum Comedy), Danny McGinlay (Food Dude, The Project, Danny McGinlay Learns Ukrainian) and Rama Nicholas (Impro Melbourne, Late Night Impro) as they travel to that galaxy far far away and totally get things a bit wrong.

Tickets $15 at the door, $12 + bf when booked online at bellaunion.com.au; but you knew that, right?